TV sitting ducks” or “It is like oh, cool... but simply not a good fit for the job” and “It was like an interview, except I feel like I do better in interviews”.

You may be a terrific person and all, but experiences like this can shatter your nerves and reduce your self co

If you're reading this article, chances are you've had one of those experiences when you feel like you should just abandon dating altogether because you are sick and tired of being on the defensive MOST of the time, and at the edge of frustration ALL the time.

Today’s dating has become something like an interview or audition where you have to impress someone into liking you. Overanalyzing dates has become an obsession – and second nature for most people. A date starts really great, there is some chemistry going on and in the middle of it you start to feel the date slowly turning into an interview or audition of sorts. He or she is asking the questions and you are forced to give reasons as to why you’re a great catch. You feel like you're present at your own autopsy: being ripped apart, exhaustively and critically examined and crudely sewn back together.

I have several friends and clients who have come from a date upset and discouraged because they meet men and women who overanalyze every word, every move and every single minute detail. I hear things like “I felt like one of those reality TV sitting ducks” or “It is like oh, cool... but simply not a good fit for the job” and “It was like an interview, except I feel like I do better in interviews”.

You may be a terrific person and all, but experiences like this can shatter your nerves and reduce your self con

g has become something like an interview or audition where you have to impress someone into liking you. Overanalyzing dates has become an obsession – and second nature for most people. A date starts really great, there is some chemistry going on and in the middle of it you start to feel the date slowly turning into an interview or audition of sorts. He or she is asking the questions and you are forced to give reasons as to why you’re a great catch. You feel like you're present at your own autopsy: being ripped apart, exhaustively and critically examined and crudely sewn back together.

I have several friends and clients who have come from a date upset and discouraged because they meet men and women who overanalyze every word, every move and every single minute detail. I hear things like “I felt like one of those reality TV sitting ducks” or “It is like oh, cool... but simply not a good fit for the job” and “It was like an interview, except I feel like I do better in interviews”.

You may be a terrific person and all, but experiences like this can shatter your nerves and reduce your self co

t to feel the date slowly turning into an interview or audition of sorts. He or she is asking the questions and you are forced to give reasons as to why you’re a great catch. You feel like you're present at your own autopsy: being ripped apart, exhaustively and critically examined and crudely sewn back together.

I have several friends and clients who have come from a date upset and discouraged because they meet men and women who overanalyze every word, every move and every single minute detail. I hear things like “I felt like one of those reality TV sitting ducks” or “It is like oh, cool... but simply not a good fit for the job” and “It was like an interview, except I feel like I do better in interviews”.

You may be a terrific person and all, but experiences like this can shatter your nerves and reduce your self co

ed and crudely sewn back together.

I have several friends and clients who have come from a date upset and discouraged because they meet men and women who overanalyze every word, every move and every single minute detail. I hear things like “I felt like one of those reality TV sitting ducks” or “It is like oh, cool... but simply not a good fit for the job” and “It was like an interview, except I feel like I do better in interviews”.

You may be a terrific person and all, but experiences like this can shatter your nerves and reduce your self co

TV sitting ducks” or “It is like oh, cool... but simply not a good fit for the job” and “It was like an interview, except I feel like I do better in interviews”.

You may be a terrific person and all, but experiences like this can shatter your nerves and reduce your self confidence. It's difficult not to take it personally.

If you want to get serious about dating it's time to turn things around.

1. Make dating a bond-forming ritual not an exchange of factual information or opportunity for bragging. Most people find it disturbing when on the first date you want to know their daily schedule, social security number or other assorted facts that strangers aren't usually supposed to know about them. Steer the conversation way from talking about your job, successes, property, admirers etc to topics that are about who you are (or they are), interests or opinions, what things or people inspire you/them and why etc. People bond faster when they can relate to something the other is talking about or something that seems similar. Create kinship through sensitive jokes, playfulness, teasing, touching and sometimes being downright silly. Keep in mind that all these can be culturally sensitive…

2. Do more listening than talking. My male clients when I tell them to “listen more and talk less” tell me they worry that if they don’t get to talk about themselves “how wi