dy given instructions –‘not to send MOM to those who did not attend the meeting.’ That time also I was continuing my evening shift. I felt very bad. I was traveling in the world of vampires where all the things go wrong but no one has rights to protest. In the light of previous and present scenario, I went along with my resignation letter to my new A.M., Boski Chopra. However, the immediate cause was Chitra Ma’am’s denial of my leaves last night. The matter was escalated to Chitra Ma’am. Chitra Ma’am called me and asked the cause of resignation. I was unable to answer properly due to my childish mindset of due respect. In the whole episode her motherly dealing with me was so marvelous that left me spell bound and I started feeling guilty despite of having genuine reasons. However, I was granted leaves and I started on 30th July to meet my mother from Delhi. Marching towards home I was being grabbed with the fresh ideas and joyous feelings. After a great struggle, I won my own leaves. Still, I was feeling insatiable. I could not justify myself for crying on simple things like – Shifts, training, leaves. It all really nibbled the fact which was guaranteed by Chitra Ma’am that it was our T&Q family. I came back on my due date but till then my image of happy and cheering guy was converted into a person of tantrums and grudges for which I do not consider myself responsible.

Again I was thrown in evening shifts. I was alone with myself. In the whole tenure in T&Q, hardly had I attended any meeting or value additive calibrations with the client or celtycs. But with the span of time, I calcified myself against decisive and anarchic management. My sufferings were sedimented and waiting for a outburst to meet the smooth finish. Now towards the end of Aug. my outgoing A.M., Boski Chopra informed me that you would be in the training from next month which you were asking for. My loving and caring assistant manager, Boski, whom I always called friend not a boss, was going to assume her responsibilities in Gurgaon. My new boss, Inder Bir Singh Chimni came into power. My first experiment with him ousted me with the great feeling of intellect. Chitra Ma’am would have had tons of experience but of no use for me. I could not earn anything from her. But I felt my new A.M. will be able to tender some meritocracy in me and my other team members. But till then, my fate had been decided. I was supposed to join training. Again, my boss got changed and I had to report to Abhishek Dasgupta. Though he enjoys very good confidence in the eyes of management but I had certain reservations about him. The renascent of the past when Sonal Mittal joined in the course of my agitation to move into the training was disturbing me. I found him only an obstacle in my movement into the training as Chitra Ma’am had been indicating me for the last two months by saying – ‘Let me talk to Abhishek’. (It was strictly my understanding)

In the final lap of this month September, I received no official mail of my final movement in the training but

The reader of this memoir will surely discover that I never had any fixed aim of resigning from the job which I loved to do. My intention is not to offend any one but to pay my last gratitude towards the organization.

I joined Teletech India on 07th March 05. The first introduction to the Teletech family via my trainer, Rupal Solanki was good enough to feel that I am breathing in a good organization where works are always recognized. The things moved on and my study along with the work was ready to be recognized. I earned ROR for the same also. Unfortunately, I got first jolt on 26th March when I filled a discussion log for not bringing my I-card with me. I thought my chances for promotions and further growth had vanished. But by the grace of my assistant manager, Sunaina Singh I rejuvenated myself in another form – more matured and tolerant towards the negativity in life. After 4-5 months, we got very good deal and Rajasthan process witnessed a very good expansion. Sunaina Singh resigned and Brahma Jyoti Pradhan took over the charge along with some more team leaders. The myths of euphoric feelings were defying the past. The family was expanding and the basics of the family were disappearing. At that time, we witnessed a heavy exit from our organization. The mystic steps were being taken by the management to check the problem. The group dealing and individual dealing with the individuals of the process had been carried out.

In that course of dealing, I was no exception. Kudos to Brahma jyoti Pradhan who nurtured me in a very impartial way. The lecture and demonstration by BJP himself filled a new way towards a new life – a training and quality guy. My name was nowhere when the I.J.P. was floated. Shishir kumar srivastava, a T&Q guy whose quality feedback and briefings had always propelled me towards positivism, mooted my name to the management for the post of Development specialist (at that time there was no separation of training and quality). The interview was conducted and I notched the victory only in 8 months (actual) of my tenure whereas my contemporary colleagues were still waiting to be recognized. The complete scene of promotion and the exits left a stumbling block over my name to be widely accepted.

Officially, I took the charge as Development specialist on 30th Jan. 2006 in a small T&Q meeting at 05.00 pm. Chitra Rekhade, my new boss introduced me with the rest of the team members. It was a monthly and regular meeting. I registered a great incursion within myself when I was unable to understand the jargons and conundrums of the new world. It was not quality scores, AHT, Log in hours or attendance but it was something which I had never been exposed to. My immediate challenge was to understand different tools of quality. At this juncture, I was given a training batch on 02nd Feb. 2006 with Pankaj Soni as my mentor. It was a job which my natural love was always bounded with – to deal and mould the human psychology. Pankaj Soni accompanied me for 4-5 days after the simulation of the batch. I was still unaware of the technical jargons of the process. However, I completed the entire training process within the prescribed time format and assumed the work monitoring the calls of Rajasthan process. I again was wrested in the technical jargons. In the second phase of journey ‘Priyanka Saumiyal’ an innocent, loving but incompetent mentor was accompanying me.

After 2-3 days, I started my daily works smoothly. At that time I had two challenges primarily – 1) making a widespread acceptability (as it was hampered during my selections) and 2) To learn quickly the daily works and tools of T&Q. In the ongoing hustle and bustles within I shared my willingness to talk to Chitra ma’am for the exigency of training for myself with Priyanka. Hardly had I shared my views, Priyanka stopped me by saying –“No, you will be asked to learn by yourself”. There was no fixed module under which I could be saved from ongoing agony after my introduction in T&Q. I was continuously doing evening shift which was the main hurdle in learning the things (I realized it later on). However, I geared myself in a different way rather than complaining or nagging for anything. I looked at Shishir whom I pay my great for guiding and suggesting the ways for the actions and reactions. Shishir and my own home PC fortified me to grab the tools speedily. Till that time, I have been continuously under the peril of Ruchi Gupta’s (D.S Raj. Process) mails lecturing the need of meeting the target on daily basis. I was unable to understand what to do and what not. However, in these all griming situation my shift left me nowhere except answering those mails of Ruchi by admitting the faults.

Ruchi Gupta, one of the oldest Development specialists in Okhala Site. Her stories and style of working was not new to me when I was doing my job as CSA. Her reactions in one T&Q meeting when Shilpa (Ex DS in RAJ. Process) revealed her stark picture of false monitoring. (Later on, Shilpa resigned) One day, I also witnessed the same thing. That day, I came little earlier around 2-2.30pm and touched Ruchi to greet her. I saw she was sleeping and call was being monitored. After 5-10 minutes her target was met – 27 monitoring. Out of 27, all the 27 calls were marked as fatal error calls. Was there a need of doing monitoring due to which the image of whole T&Q team was tarnished? Challenging Gaurav Sharma (TL Raj. Process) and Lalit Chaudhary (TL Raj Process) openly was also witnessed by every one. Gaurav sharma’s charged her of doing false monitoring as no calls were found in verint under such number which her DQR was reflecting. In this regard I could not get any follow ups afterward. Their teams had never performed in terms of quality till Ruchi was doing bargings for their teams. I was aware of these all incidents when I was continuing my job as quality auditor.

I never dared to reply her mails when she alone tilted at me, Khalid, and Priyanka. Her one mail describing the essence of Covey Matrix left me furious and I decided to reply back to Chitra ma’am directly in the form of protest. But Priyanka told me “Madam is not going to do anything except shouting on you.” These all negations were disturbing me overnight. But till now, I could not understand the role of Chitra Ma’am who was keeping quite despite of knowing all the pros and cons of the team.

During those days of unnecessary and unfair war of supremacy, I was still mingling with the two challenges. I was trying hard to share my views and ideas of “quality as philosophy not a force”. Meanwhile Rakhi Vermani was also doing wonderful job of analyzing CQ by celtycs. Again, my second batch came and I started training the new comers with my more effective experience. In that batch there was a majority of girls whom the HR had promised to give morning shift. I shared the same with Chitra Ma’am and the batch got shifted in the morning for 12 days. While working in morning shift I realized that morning shifts are more eventful where I can groom myself effectively. After that completion of my batch, I politely requested Chitra Ma’am to put me in the morning shift. The answer was – next month (April- May). Till that time, the hiring and training process was completed. It was now the time to get the title of trainer and the QSS. I was awarded with the title of “back –up trainer” without enquiring the willingness whereas my contemporary development specialists (Gaurav, Durgesh, Bipin etc.) were asked their choices. I expressed my unhappiness to my boss. The time moved on I was learning and struggling with the alone nights in the evening shifts. I realized the need of leaves to pay my visit to my mother staying in Madurai. It was the month of March when I expressed the same to Chitra Ma’am. The reply was – ‘let Amit Singha come back then go’. I agreed keeping in view that I was a new comer and I was not entitle for the leaves. In the next month Shishir nd Khalid (who joined after me) went on leaves. I expressed my dissatisfaction to Chitra Ma’am and was told – ‘in the next month’. In this entire episode I was fighting for two things for which I was eligible.

In the month of May, on 28th (my week off) I boldly but not bluntly asked for leaves and morning shifts. For the two, I was answered – “Ritesh, we are getting new team members in the next month and as Priyanka had resigned so, you need to take care of evening shift and train the new comers. Towards the end of June you can go on leaves. After this statement of Chitra Ma’am, I was happy and sad too. Happy ….. Because the new comers would be able to get training and sad because I could not get the both.

Priyanka Suamiyal resigned on 30th June. She was very caring and loving girl. She was incompetent but very sincere employee. She left very good impression on me and the CSAs as well. Her feedback used to be very constructive. On one day, over some issues Chitra Ma’am summoned her. After the discussions, Chitra Ma’am told her to do morning shift as company policies prohibits girls in the continuous evening shifts (whereas this policy is not applicable for support staffs). However, she had medical reasons to do the evening shifts. She needed sun bath for her treatment. But the discussion filled her womb with deep annoyance which she outburst in the form of eye drops on her last night with Teletech. In the month of July I stood alone in the entire ownership of evening shifts. My new company was with Ample, Sangat, Neeraj who were just got introduced with Rajasthan process. Priyanka’s resignations and my miseries on professional front went on hand in hand.

The month of July was witnessing a complete metaphor in the family. The training and quality was being separated. Forgetting all the shyness, I went to Chitra Ma’am and expressed my willingness to move to training along with a pseudo threat of resignation. She promised that she would talk to Abhishek (A.M., Training). The time passed, I was continuously doing evening shift which made me lame duck in order to get direct in touch with Chitra Ma’am. One IJP for trainer was floated and Sonal mittal, a CSA was awarded with the new role of trainer. That time Pankaj Soni and Namarata were her predecessors. I realized the things were going out of my hand and I showed my first strong agitation to go in training. Meanwhile, I was also running unhappy by not getting chance to pay my visit to my mother. I was feeling unable to contact and get one to one with Chitra Ma’am due to evening shifts. Whenever I tried to express myself either Priyanka’s wordings or her busy schedule of 04.00 to 06.00pm stopped me. It was also true that my shyness and strong appearance of Chitra Ma’am had also put addition to that. I was getting no open space to express her directly. Ultimately, I looked at Shishir as my hope to pass my signals to Chitra Ma’am. That also proved my no way. The appalling condition has become my destiny. My condition could not be shared with anyone. I started thinking on the line – “Neither I am getting my shift, leaves nor desired type of remunerations towards the job ( as I was getting 1 lack – lowest Package in my group)then why should not I go for my type of asylum where I can get my monetary satisfaction at least”.

My negative thoughts were developing in these days. One day when I was smoking out side I confronted with Chitra Ma’am. In the due respect, I threw my half finished cigarette and started talking to Chitra Ma’am. Then I came to know about a corporate terminology – ‘Market correction’. (Later on, in the month of Aug. I produced my lucrative offer of Tech Mahindra -1.5 lakh in order to get the market correction)

In the month of July, as I mentioned earlier, things were changing day by day. June in the threat of rumour of closure of Okhala site passed and July brought us a new A.M., Boski Chopra. In the month of June, there was a rumour that Okhala site was going to be closed which Chitra Ma’am herself defied in a meeting held in the morning shift. When I heard about the meeting I asked for the MOM from my team members which was denied as Chitra Ma’am had already given instructions –‘not to send MOM to those who did not attend the meeting.’ That time also I was continuing my evening shift. I felt very bad. I was traveling in the world of vampires where all the things go wrong but no one has rights to protest. In the light of previous and present scenario, I went along with my resignation letter to my new A.M., Boski Chopra. However, the immediate cause was Chitra Ma’am’s denial of my leaves last night. The matter was escalated to Chitra Ma’am. Chitra Ma’am called me and asked the cause of resignation. I was unable to answer properly due to my childish mindset of due respect. In the whole episode her motherly dealing with me was so marvelous that left me spell bound and I started feeling guilty despite of having genuine reasons. However, I was granted leaves and I started on 30th July to meet my mother from Delhi. Marching towards home I was being grabbed with the fresh ideas and joyous feelings. After a great struggle, I won my own leaves. Still, I was feeling insatiable. I could not justify myself for crying on simple things like – Shifts, training, leaves. It all really nibbled the fact which was guaranteed by Chitra Ma’am that it was our T&Q family. I came back on my due date but till then my image of happy and cheering guy was converted into a person of tantrums and grudges for which I do not consider myself responsible.

Again I was thrown in evening shifts. I was alone with myself. In the whole tenure in T&Q, hardly had I attended any meeting or value additive calibrations with the client or celtycs. But with the span of time, I calcified myself against decisive and anarchic management. My sufferings were sedimented and waiting for a outburst to meet the smooth finish. Now towards the end of Aug. my outgoing A.M., Boski Chopra informed me that you would be in the training from next month which you were asking for. My loving and caring assistant manager, Boski, whom I always called friend not a boss, was going to assume her responsibilities in Gurgaon. My new boss, Inder Bir Singh Chimni came into power. My first experiment with him ousted me with the great feeling of intellect. Chitra Ma’am would have had tons of experience but of no use for me. I could not earn anything from her. But I felt my new A.M. will be able to tender some meritocracy in me and my other team members. But till then, my fate had been decided. I was supposed to join training. Again, my boss got changed and I had to report to Abhishek Dasgupta. Though he enjoys very good confidence in the eyes of management but I had certain reservations about him. The renascent of the past when Sonal Mittal joined in the course of my agitation to move into the training was disturbing me. I found him only an obstacle in my movement into the training as Chitra Ma’am had been indicating me for the last two months by saying – ‘Let me talk to Abhishek’. (It was strictly my understanding)

In the final lap of this month September, I received no official mail of my final movement in the training but

batch. I was still unaware of the technical jargons of the process. However, I completed the entire training process within the prescribed time format and assumed the work monitoring the calls of Rajasthan process. I again was wrested in the technical jargons. In the second phase of journey ‘Priyanka Saumiyal’ an innocent, loving but incompetent mentor was accompanying me.

After 2-3 days, I started my daily works smoothly. At that time I had two challenges primarily – 1) making a widespread acceptability (as it was hampered during my selections) and 2) To learn quickly the daily works and tools of T&Q. In the ongoing hustle and bustles within I shared my willingness to talk to Chitra ma’am for the exigency of training for myself with Priyanka. Hardly had I shared my views, Priyanka stopped me by saying –“No, you will be asked to learn by yourself”. There was no fixed module under which I could be saved from ongoing agony after my introduction in T&Q. I was continuously doing evening shift which was the main hurdle in learning the things (I realized it later on). However, I geared myself in a different way rather than complaining or nagging for anything. I looked at Shishir whom I pay my great for guiding and suggesting the ways for the actions and reactions. Shishir and my own home PC fortified me to grab the tools speedily. Till that time, I have been continuously under the peril of Ruchi Gupta’s (D.S Raj. Process) mails lecturing the need of meeting the target on daily basis. I was unable to understand what to do and what not. However, in these all griming situation my shift left me nowhere except answering those mails of Ruchi by admitting the faults.

Ruchi Gupta, one of the oldest Development specialists in Okhala Site. Her stories and style of working was not new to me when I was doing my job as CSA. Her reactions in one T&Q meeting when Shilpa (Ex DS in RAJ. Process) revealed her stark picture of false monitoring. (Later on, Shilpa resigned) One day, I also witnessed the same thing. That day, I came little earlier around 2-2.30pm and touched Ruchi to greet her. I saw she was sleeping and call was being monitored. After 5-10 minutes her target was met – 27 monitoring. Out of 27, all the 27 calls were marked as fatal error calls. Was there a need of doing monitoring due to which the image of whole T&Q team was tarnished? Challenging Gaurav Sharma (TL Raj. Process) and Lalit Chaudhary (TL Raj Process) openly was also witnessed by every one. Gaurav sharma’s charged her of doing false monitoring as no calls were found in verint under such number which her DQR was reflecting. In this regard I could not get any follow ups afterward. Their teams had never performed in terms of quality till Ruchi was doing bargings for their teams. I was aware of these all incidents when I was continuing my job as quality auditor.

I never dared to reply her mails when she alone tilted at me, Khalid, and Priyanka. Her one mail describing the essence of Covey Matrix left me furious and I decided to reply back to Chitra ma’am directly in the form of protest. But Priyanka told me “Madam is not going to do anything except shouting on you.” These all negations were disturbing me overnight. But till now, I could not understand the role of Chitra Ma’am who was keeping quite despite of knowing all the pros and cons of the team.

During those days of unnecessary and unfair war of supremacy, I was still mingling with the two challenges. I was trying hard to share my views and ideas of “quality as philosophy not a force”. Meanwhile Rakhi Vermani was also doing wonderful job of analyzing CQ by celtycs. Again, my second batch came and I started training the new comers with my more effective experience. In that batch there was a majority of girls whom the HR had promised to give morning shift. I shared the same with Chitra Ma’am and the batch got shifted in the morning for 12 days. While working in morning shift I realized that morning shifts are more eventful where I can groom myself effectively. After that completion of my batch, I politely requested Chitra Ma’am to put me in the morning shift. The answer was – next month (April- May). Till that time, the hiring and training process was completed. It was now the time to get the title of trainer and the QSS. I was awarded with the title of “back –up trainer” without enquiring the willingness whereas my contemporary development specialists (Gaurav, Durgesh, Bipin etc.) were asked their choices. I expressed my unhappiness to my boss. The time moved on I was learning and struggling with the alone nights in the evening shifts. I realized the need of leaves to pay my visit to my mother staying in Madurai. It was the month of March when I expressed the same to Chitra Ma’am. The reply was – ‘let Amit Singha come back then go’. I agreed keeping in view that I was a new comer and I was not entitle for the leaves. In the next month Shishir nd Khalid (who joined after me) went on leaves. I expressed my dissatisfaction to Chitra Ma’am and was told – ‘in the next month’. In this entire episode I was fighting for two things for which I was eligible.

In the month of May, on 28th (my week off) I boldly but not bluntly asked for leaves and morning shifts. For the two, I was answered – “Ritesh, we are getting new team members in the next month and as Priyanka had resigned so, you need to take care of evening shift and train the new comers. Towards the end of June you can go on leaves. After this statement of Chitra Ma’am, I was happy and sad too. Happy ….. Because the new comers would be able to get training and sad because I could not get the both.

Priyanka Suamiyal resigned on 30th June. She was very caring and loving girl. She was incompetent but very sincere employee. She left very good impression on me and the CSAs as well. Her feedback used to be very constructive. On one day, over some issues Chitra Ma’am summoned her. After the discussions, Chitra Ma’am told her to do morning shift as company policies prohibits girls in the continuous evening shifts (whereas this policy is not applicable for support staffs). However, she had medical reasons to do the evening shifts. She needed sun bath for her treatment. But the discussion filled her womb with deep annoyance which she outburst in the form of eye drops on her last night with Teletech. In the month of July I stood alone in the entire ownership of evening shifts. My new company was with Ample, Sangat, Neeraj who were just got introduced with Rajasthan process. Priyanka’s resignations and my miseries on professional front went on hand in hand.

The month of July was witnessing a complete metaphor in the family. The training and quality was being separated. Forgetting all the shyness, I went to Chitra Ma’am and expressed my willingness to move to training along with a pseudo threat of resignation. She promised that she would talk to Abhishek (A.M., Training). The time passed, I was continuously doing evening shift which made me lame duck in order to get direct in touch with Chitra Ma’am. One IJP for trainer was floated and Sonal mittal, a CSA was awarded with the new role of trainer. That time Pankaj Soni and Namarata were her predecessors. I realized the things were going out of my hand and I showed my first strong agitation to go in training. Meanwhile, I was also running unhappy by not getting chance to pay my visit to my mother. I was feeling unable to contact and get one to one with Chitra Ma’am due to evening shifts. Whenever I tried to express myself either Priyanka’s wordings or her busy schedule of 04.00 to 06.00pm stopped me. It was also true that my shyness and strong appearance of Chitra Ma’am had also put addition to that. I was getting no open space to express her directly. Ultimately, I looked at Shishir as my hope to pass my signals to Chitra Ma’am. That also proved my no way. The appalling condition has become my destiny. My condition could not be shared with anyone. I started thinking on the line – “Neither I am getting my shift, leaves nor desired type of remunerations towards the job ( as I was getting 1 lack – lowest Package in my group)then why should not I go for my type of asylum where I can get my monetary satisfaction at least”.

My negative thoughts were developing in these days. One day when I was smoking out side I confronted with Chitra Ma’am. In the due respect, I threw my half finished cigarette and started talking to Chitra Ma’am. Then I came to know about a corporate terminology – ‘Market correction’. (Later on, in the month of Aug. I produced my lucrative offer of Tech Mahindra -1.5 lakh in order to get the market correction)

In the month of July, as I mentioned earlier, things were changing day by day. June in the threat of rumour of closure of Okhala site passed and July brought us a new A.M., Boski Chopra. In the month of June, there was a rumour that Okhala site was going to be closed which Chitra Ma’am herself defied in a meeting held in the morning shift. When I heard about the meeting I asked for the MOM from my team members which was denied as Chitra Ma’am had already given instructions –‘not to send MOM to those who did not attend the meeting.’ That time also I was continuing my evening shift. I felt very bad. I was traveling in the world of vampires where all the things go wrong but no one has rights to protest. In the light of previous and present scenario, I went along with my resignation letter to my new A.M., Boski Chopra. However, the immediate cause was Chitra Ma’am’s denial of my leaves last night. The matter was escalated to Chitra Ma’am. Chitra Ma’am called me and asked the cause of resignation. I was unable to answer properly due to my childish mindset of due respect. In the whole episode her motherly dealing with me was so marvelous that left me spell bound and I started feeling guilty despite of having genuine reasons. However, I was granted leaves and I started on 30th July to meet my mother from Delhi. Marching towards home I was being grabbed with the fresh ideas and joyous feelings. After a great struggle, I won my own leaves. Still, I was feeling insatiable. I could not justify myself for crying on simple things like – Shifts, training, leaves. It all really nibbled the fact which was guaranteed by Chitra Ma’am that it was our T&Q family. I came back on my due date but till then my image of happy and cheering guy was converted into a person of tantrums and grudges for which I do not consider myself responsible.

Again I was thrown in evening shifts. I was alone with myself. In the whole tenure in T&Q, hardly had I attended any meeting or value additive calibrations with the client or celtycs. But with the span of time, I calcified myself against decisive and anarchic management. My sufferings were sedimented and waiting for a outburst to meet the smooth finish. Now towards the end of Aug. my outgoing A.M., Boski Chopra informed me that you would be in the training from next month which you were asking for. My loving and caring assistant manager, Boski, whom I always called friend not a boss, was going to assume her responsibilities in Gurgaon. My new boss, Inder Bir Singh Chimni came into power. My first experiment with him ousted me with the great feeling of intellect. Chitra Ma’am would have had tons of experience but of no use for me. I could not earn anything from her. But I felt my new A.M. will be able to tender some meritocracy in me and my other team members. But till then, my fate had been decided. I was supposed to join training. Again, my boss got changed and I had to report to Abhishek Dasgupta. Though he enjoys very good confidence in the eyes of management but I had certain reservations about him. The renascent of the past when Sonal Mittal joined in the course of my agitation to move into the training was disturbing me. I found him only an obstacle in my movement into the training as Chitra Ma’am had been indicating me for the last two months by saying – ‘Let me talk to Abhishek’. (It was strictly my understanding)

In the final lap of this month September, I received no official mail of my final movement in the training but

to Chitra ma’am directly in the form of protest. But Priyanka told me “Madam is not going to do anything except shouting on you.” These all negations were disturbing me overnight. But till now, I could not understand the role of Chitra Ma’am who was keeping quite despite of knowing all the pros and cons of the team.

During those days of unnecessary and unfair war of supremacy, I was still mingling with the two challenges. I was trying hard to share my views and ideas of “quality as philosophy not a force”. Meanwhile Rakhi Vermani was also doing wonderful job of analyzing CQ by celtycs. Again, my second batch came and I started training the new comers with my more effective experience. In that batch there was a majority of girls whom the HR had promised to give morning shift. I shared the same with Chitra Ma’am and the batch got shifted in the morning for 12 days. While working in morning shift I realized that morning shifts are more eventful where I can groom myself effectively. After that completion of my batch, I politely requested Chitra Ma’am to put me in the morning shift. The answer was – next month (April- May). Till that time, the hiring and training process was completed. It was now the time to get the title of trainer and the QSS. I was awarded with the title of “back –up trainer” without enquiring the willingness whereas my contemporary development specialists (Gaurav, Durgesh, Bipin etc.) were asked their choices. I expressed my unhappiness to my boss. The time moved on I was learning and struggling with the alone nights in the evening shifts. I realized the need of leaves to pay my visit to my mother staying in Madurai. It was the month of March when I expressed the same to Chitra Ma’am. The reply was – ‘let Amit Singha come back then go’. I agreed keeping in view that I was a new comer and I was not entitle for the leaves. In the next month Shishir nd Khalid (who joined after me) went on leaves. I expressed my dissatisfaction to Chitra Ma’am and was told – ‘in the next month’. In this entire episode I was fighting for two things for which I was eligible.

In the month of May, on 28th (my week off) I boldly but not bluntly asked for leaves and morning shifts. For the two, I was answered – “Ritesh, we are getting new team members in the next month and as Priyanka had resigned so, you need to take care of evening shift and train the new comers. Towards the end of June you can go on leaves. After this statement of Chitra Ma’am, I was happy and sad too. Happy ….. Because the new comers would be able to get training and sad because I could not get the both.

Priyanka Suamiyal resigned on 30th June. She was very caring and loving girl. She was incompetent but very sincere employee. She left very good impression on me and the CSAs as well. Her feedback used to be very constructive. On one day, over some issues Chitra Ma’am summoned her. After the discussions, Chitra Ma’am told her to do morning shift as company policies prohibits girls in the continuous evening shifts (whereas this policy is not applicable for support staffs). However, she had medical reasons to do the evening shifts. She needed sun bath for her treatment. But the discussion filled her womb with deep annoyance which she outburst in the form of eye drops on her last night with Teletech. In the month of July I stood alone in the entire ownership of evening shifts. My new company was with Ample, Sangat, Neeraj who were just got introduced with Rajasthan process. Priyanka’s resignations and my miseries on professional front went on hand in hand.

The month of July was witnessing a complete metaphor in the family. The training and quality was being separated. Forgetting all the shyness, I went to Chitra Ma’am and expressed my willingness to move to training along with a pseudo threat of resignation. She promised that she would talk to Abhishek (A.M., Training). The time passed, I was continuously doing evening shift which made me lame duck in order to get direct in touch with Chitra Ma’am. One IJP for trainer was floated and Sonal mittal, a CSA was awarded with the new role of trainer. That time Pankaj Soni and Namarata were her predecessors. I realized the things were going out of my hand and I showed my first strong agitation to go in training. Meanwhile, I was also running unhappy by not getting chance to pay my visit to my mother. I was feeling unable to contact and get one to one with Chitra Ma’am due to evening shifts. Whenever I tried to express myself either Priyanka’s wordings or her busy schedule of 04.00 to 06.00pm stopped me. It was also true that my shyness and strong appearance of Chitra Ma’am had also put addition to that. I was getting no open space to express her directly. Ultimately, I looked at Shishir as my hope to pass my signals to Chitra Ma’am. That also proved my no way. The appalling condition has become my destiny. My condition could not be shared with anyone. I started thinking on the line – “Neither I am getting my shift, leaves nor desired type of remunerations towards the job ( as I was getting 1 lack – lowest Package in my group)then why should not I go for my type of asylum where I can get my monetary satisfaction at least”.

My negative thoughts were developing in these days. One day when I was smoking out side I confronted with Chitra Ma’am. In the due respect, I threw my half finished cigarette and started talking to Chitra Ma’am. Then I came to know about a corporate terminology – ‘Market correction’. (Later on, in the month of Aug. I produced my lucrative offer of Tech Mahindra -1.5 lakh in order to get the market correction)

In the month of July, as I mentioned earlier, things were changing day by day. June in the threat of rumour of closure of Okhala site passed and July brought us a new A.M., Boski Chopra. In the month of June, there was a rumour that Okhala site was going to be closed which Chitra Ma’am herself defied in a meeting held in the morning shift. When I heard about the meeting I asked for the MOM from my team members which was denied as Chitra Ma’am had already given instructions –‘not to send MOM to those who did not attend the meeting.’ That time also I was continuing my evening shift. I felt very bad. I was traveling in the world of vampires where all the things go wrong but no one has rights to protest. In the light of previous and present scenario, I went along with my resignation letter to my new A.M., Boski Chopra. However, the immediate cause was Chitra Ma’am’s denial of my leaves last night. The matter was escalated to Chitra Ma’am. Chitra Ma’am called me and asked the cause of resignation. I was unable to answer properly due to my childish mindset of due respect. In the whole episode her motherly dealing with me was so marvelous that left me spell bound and I started feeling guilty despite of having genuine reasons. However, I was granted leaves and I started on 30th July to meet my mother from Delhi. Marching towards home I was being grabbed with the fresh ideas and joyous feelings. After a great struggle, I won my own leaves. Still, I was feeling insatiable. I could not justify myself for crying on simple things like – Shifts, training, leaves. It all really nibbled the fact which was guaranteed by Chitra Ma’am that it was our T&Q family. I came back on my due date but till then my image of happy and cheering guy was converted into a person of tantrums and grudges for which I do not consider myself responsible.

Again I was thrown in evening shifts. I was alone with myself. In the whole tenure in T&Q, hardly had I attended any meeting or value additive calibrations with the client or celtycs. But with the span of time, I calcified myself against decisive and anarchic management. My sufferings were sedimented and waiting for a outburst to meet the smooth finish. Now towards the end of Aug. my outgoing A.M., Boski Chopra informed me that you would be in the training from next month which you were asking for. My loving and caring assistant manager, Boski, whom I always called friend not a boss, was going to assume her responsibilities in Gurgaon. My new boss, Inder Bir Singh Chimni came into power. My first experiment with him ousted me with the great feeling of intellect. Chitra Ma’am would have had tons of experience but of no use for me. I could not earn anything from her. But I felt my new A.M. will be able to tender some meritocracy in me and my other team members. But till then, my fate had been decided. I was supposed to join training. Again, my boss got changed and I had to report to Abhishek Dasgupta. Though he enjoys very good confidence in the eyes of management but I had certain reservations about him. The renascent of the past when Sonal Mittal joined in the course of my agitation to move into the training was disturbing me. I found him only an obstacle in my movement into the training as Chitra Ma’am had been indicating me for the last two months by saying – ‘Let me talk to Abhishek’. (It was strictly my understanding)

In the final lap of this month September, I received no official mail of my final movement in the training but

icy is not applicable for support staffs). However, she had medical reasons to do the evening shifts. She needed sun bath for her treatment. But the discussion filled her womb with deep annoyance which she outburst in the form of eye drops on her last night with Teletech. In the month of July I stood alone in the entire ownership of evening shifts. My new company was with Ample, Sangat, Neeraj who were just got introduced with Rajasthan process. Priyanka’s resignations and my miseries on professional front went on hand in hand.

The month of July was witnessing a complete metaphor in the family. The training and quality was being separated. Forgetting all the shyness, I went to Chitra Ma’am and expressed my willingness to move to training along with a pseudo threat of resignation. She promised that she would talk to Abhishek (A.M., Training). The time passed, I was continuously doing evening shift which made me lame duck in order to get direct in touch with Chitra Ma’am. One IJP for trainer was floated and Sonal mittal, a CSA was awarded with the new role of trainer. That time Pankaj Soni and Namarata were her predecessors. I realized the things were going out of my hand and I showed my first strong agitation to go in training. Meanwhile, I was also running unhappy by not getting chance to pay my visit to my mother. I was feeling unable to contact and get one to one with Chitra Ma’am due to evening shifts. Whenever I tried to express myself either Priyanka’s wordings or her busy schedule of 04.00 to 06.00pm stopped me. It was also true that my shyness and strong appearance of Chitra Ma’am had also put addition to that. I was getting no open space to express her directly. Ultimately, I looked at Shishir as my hope to pass my signals to Chitra Ma’am. That also proved my no way. The appalling condition has become my destiny. My condition could not be shared with anyone. I started thinking on the line – “Neither I am getting my shift, leaves nor desired type of remunerations towards the job ( as I was getting 1 lack – lowest Package in my group)then why should not I go for my type of asylum where I can get my monetary satisfaction at least”.

My negative thoughts were developing in these days. One day when I was smoking out side I confronted with Chitra Ma’am. In the due respect, I threw my half finished cigarette and started talking to Chitra Ma’am. Then I came to know about a corporate terminology – ‘Market correction’. (Later on, in the month of Aug. I produced my lucrative offer of Tech Mahindra -1.5 lakh in order to get the market correction)

In the month of July, as I mentioned earlier, things were changing day by day. June in the threat of rumour of closure of Okhala site passed and July brought us a new A.M., Boski Chopra. In the month of June, there was a rumour that Okhala site was going to be closed which Chitra Ma’am herself defied in a meeting held in the morning shift. When I heard about the meeting I asked for the MOM from my team members which was denied as Chitra Ma’am had already given instructions –‘not to send MOM to those who did not attend the meeting.’ That time also I was continuing my evening shift. I felt very bad. I was traveling in the world of vampires where all the things go wrong but no one has rights to protest. In the light of previous and present scenario, I went along with my resignation letter to my new A.M., Boski Chopra. However, the immediate cause was Chitra Ma’am’s denial of my leaves last night. The matter was escalated to Chitra Ma’am. Chitra Ma’am called me and asked the cause of resignation. I was unable to answer properly due to my childish mindset of due respect. In the whole episode her motherly dealing with me was so marvelous that left me spell bound and I started feeling guilty despite of having genuine reasons. However, I was granted leaves and I started on 30th July to meet my mother from Delhi. Marching towards home I was being grabbed with the fresh ideas and joyous feelings. After a great struggle, I won my own leaves. Still, I was feeling insatiable. I could not justify myself for crying on simple things like – Shifts, training, leaves. It all really nibbled the fact which was guaranteed by Chitra Ma’am that it was our T&Q family. I came back on my due date but till then my image of happy and cheering guy was converted into a person of tantrums and grudges for which I do not consider myself responsible.

Again I was thrown in evening shifts. I was alone with myself. In the whole tenure in T&Q, hardly had I attended any meeting or value additive calibrations with the client or celtycs. But with the span of time, I calcified myself against decisive and anarchic management. My sufferings were sedimented and waiting for a outburst to meet the smooth finish. Now towards the end of Aug. my outgoing A.M., Boski Chopra informed me that you would be in the training from next month which you were asking for. My loving and caring assistant manager, Boski, whom I always called friend not a boss, was going to assume her responsibilities in Gurgaon. My new boss, Inder Bir Singh Chimni came into power. My first experiment with him ousted me with the great feeling of intellect. Chitra Ma’am would have had tons of experience but of no use for me. I could not earn anything from her. But I felt my new A.M. will be able to tender some meritocracy in me and my other team members. But till then, my fate had been decided. I was supposed to join training. Again, my boss got changed and I had to report to Abhishek Dasgupta. Though he enjoys very good confidence in the eyes of management but I had certain reservations about him. The renascent of the past when Sonal Mittal joined in the course of my agitation to move into the training was disturbing me. I found him only an obstacle in my movement into the training as Chitra Ma’am had been indicating me for the last two months by saying – ‘Let me talk to Abhishek’. (It was strictly my understanding)

In the final lap of this month September, I received no official mail of my final movement in the training but

dy given instructions –‘not to send MOM to those who did not attend the meeting.’ That time also I was continuing my evening shift. I felt very bad. I was traveling in the world of vampires where all the things go wrong but no one has rights to protest. In the light of previous and present scenario, I went along with my resignation letter to my new A.M., Boski Chopra. However, the immediate cause was Chitra Ma’am’s denial of my leaves last night. The matter was escalated to Chitra Ma’am. Chitra Ma’am called me and asked the cause of resignation. I was unable to answer properly due to my childish mindset of due respect. In the whole episode her motherly dealing with me was so marvelous that left me spell bound and I started feeling guilty despite of having genuine reasons. However, I was granted leaves and I started on 30th July to meet my mother from Delhi. Marching towards home I was being grabbed with the fresh ideas and joyous feelings. After a great struggle, I won my own leaves. Still, I was feeling insatiable. I could not justify myself for crying on simple things like – Shifts, training, leaves. It all really nibbled the fact which was guaranteed by Chitra Ma’am that it was our T&Q family. I came back on my due date but till then my image of happy and cheering guy was converted into a person of tantrums and grudges for which I do not consider myself responsible.

Again I was thrown in evening shifts. I was alone with myself. In the whole tenure in T&Q, hardly had I attended any meeting or value additive calibrations with the client or celtycs. But with the span of time, I calcified myself against decisive and anarchic management. My sufferings were sedimented and waiting for a outburst to meet the smooth finish. Now towards the end of Aug. my outgoing A.M., Boski Chopra informed me that you would be in the training from next month which you were asking for. My loving and caring assistant manager, Boski, whom I always called friend not a boss, was going to assume her responsibilities in Gurgaon. My new boss, Inder Bir Singh Chimni came into power. My first experiment with him ousted me with the great feeling of intellect. Chitra Ma’am would have had tons of experience but of no use for me. I could not earn anything from her. But I felt my new A.M. will be able to tender some meritocracy in me and my other team members. But till then, my fate had been decided. I was supposed to join training. Again, my boss got changed and I had to report to Abhishek Dasgupta. Though he enjoys very good confidence in the eyes of management but I had certain reservations about him. The renascent of the past when Sonal Mittal joined in the course of my agitation to move into the training was disturbing me. I found him only an obstacle in my movement into the training as Chitra Ma’am had been indicating me for the last two months by saying – ‘Let me talk to Abhishek’. (It was strictly my understanding)

In the final lap of this month September, I received no official mail of my final movement in the training but received a welcoming roster which stated my training schedule at 11.30 pm to 7.30am. Immediately I registered my dissatisfaction with Abhishek by saying –‘Am I patent to the evening and night shifts. Will I ever get a chance to be audited? Like a government office I have been receiving assurance repeatedly for the next month and next month. Will it meet an end ever?’ My outburst again dragged me into the court of Chitra Ma’am where I was shimmering among my three bosses – Chitra Ma’am, Abhishek sir, and Inderbir singh Chimni. What a wonderful welcome I received during my movement into the training. My genuine concerns disappeared in the megalomania of the hyper management.

In this entire scenario I could not find the answers of the following

1. Was I wrong when I asked for change of shift which was not leaving me for last 8 months?

2. Should I be held responsible for asked to resign (however not directly told) for these all aftermaths?

3. Can not one demand for his/her value addition while working in Training and Quality?

4. Should I be alone held responsible for my whole sedimented grievances?

5. Should I be held responsible for the blasphemy which was reflected in the form of distrust in the management?

6. Could I have not been given a chance to map up my agony and change into the burning sun light?

I tendered my notice on 18th Sep, the day I was having week off. But my morality did not allow me to leave my management into the crisis as the batch was scheduled and other expert trainers were busy with another batch. I served my notice till 30th Sep. I was now in the night with my batch and heavy heart. It was really bad feeling for me thinking about my resignation and last working day. Above all, my outburst was held justifiable by every manager of mine but no one initiated to take the ownership of mine. I was awarded the title – a trouble monger, a person of tantrums, a person of negativities and many more. But had anyone tried to put his/her own feet in my shoes? In my views if your subordinate is not able to see the light of wisdom, he/she should not be held responsible but the force or the management who is guiding that fellow should be considered failed. Management does not do the owner’s job by delegation, but has independent objective role grounded in performance.

Management is the catalyst which makes possible social and economic development in freedom and dignity. Its legitimacy rests on a code of responsibilities and accountabilities. Efficiency is the minimum condition of success, effectiveness is its foundation which I earned and strengthened during my quality feedbacks and trainings as well. The basic factor in economic development is the brain formation which I always fought for. Management means the substitution of brawn, knowledge for blind faith and co-operation for force. The once unique contribution of a manager is to give subordinates the vision and moral responsibilities to perform. This ultimately defines a ‘Manager’. Alas had these all been met and I would have been able to continue my loving job.

I never had thought that I would be propelled in such a condition where I would feel alone and would get no option of coming back? However, it added a new experience in my life so that I would be able to work further in life. Ultimately no one suffered but I alone had to resign. I refused the lucrative opportunities because I was reluctant to leave my bond of comfort with the organization. Overall, I learnt a lesson –

“Learn to lead the people by setting examples rather than containing them. Defy the pharaoh culture which is managed as if a pyramid is being built.”